Being Appukuttan

A series of limericks about Appukuttan, the eccentric, cranky, moody, yet lovable Mallu. Stay tuned for more! And yes, feedback will be much appreciated! :-)


There was a man whose accent was funny,
but everyone thought he was being phoney.
When people did him favours he said "dhangyew",
but they would ask him "are you chewing cashew?"
He thought of himself as being very "simble",
but he always made others start to grumble.
One day when he saw coconuts swaying hallu hallu,
he realised; its alright,
he was seeing life through the eyes of a mallu.
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Appukuttan roamed the fields all day,
in his chequered lungi, rolling in mounds of hay.
On days when the Sun was exceptionally kind,
he danced as if he was out of his mind.
There was a tourist from Mumbai who came to visit,
seeing Appukuttan dance he said, "Oh, a tribal dance, is it?"
Enraged, he showed the tourist his pirouette,
but it drew a lot of laughs, for his lungi was wet.
Appukuttan was downcast, for he thought he was Marilyn Monroe,
the tourist said, "Oh come on, I was just kidding, bro."
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A steaming cup of tea in the morning,
is what makes Appukuttan stop yawning.
It works well for everyone, he thought,
and it was because of this that he fought.
He had a job that gave him a lot of joy,
there was a lodge where he was a room boy.
When a white sahib ordered his morning fix,
Appukuttan brought him his own preferred mix.
Seeing the sahib seethe, he asked "are you not haaapi?"
the sahib said "@#%^ you, I had ordered kaapi!"